How to Talk to Your Parents About Your Title IX Case

If you’ve been falsely accused of a crime or any morally reprehensible behavior, it is incredibly isolating. In almost any other tragedy that occurs in your life, you can talk about it with family and friends, knowing that ultimately, your family and friends will want to support you. But being falsely accused is different – it feels like anyone you tell will respond with skepticism and suspicion rather than the support that you need. At this time in your life you need to think carefully about to whom you disclose your situation to, something you’ll likely feel instinctively. Although you may be afraid to tell your parents, and as difficult as it is to tell your parents about the accusation, it is very important that you do so.  

As someone who was falsely accused, I understand and remember what this felt like. I remember being afraid to tell my parents. When I was first contacted by the police (which preceded the university investigation in my case), even though I knew completely that I was innocent, I was afraid that if I told my parents, they would never look at me the same way because I was accused. I was afraid of being the problem child, and I felt horrible asking them to spend money on an attorney (after all, I had no money as a college student). Because of these feelings, I wanted to handle the situation myself. Thankfully, however, a few friends sat me down and convinced me to tell my parents and not go at it alone.  

Calling my parents and telling them about the situation was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do, but I am so thankful I did. Parents have an unconditional love for their children, and that is sometimes hard to fully grasp as a young adult without children. My dad flew down immediately to be with me, and over the course of the entire process and the litigation that followed, my family became closer than it ever had been before.  

If you’re feeling how I felt before I told my parents, I cannot encourage you enough that telling your parents is the right thing to do. Now as I represent students going through the Title IX process, I see parents react the same way mine did: unconditional love and support. It may be a difficult conversation, but it will ultimately make your relationship better.  

When you have the conversation, make sure to tell them everything, chronologically. They will probably have questions, which you should answer honestly. The last thing you want to do is withhold information (even if it’s embarrassing!) that you will then have to add in or correct later. Focus on how to resolve the problem together as a team. Know that your life isn’t over and that you all will get through this.  

Finally, you should talk to them about hiring an attorney. Going through this is extremely difficult without the help of someone experienced and knowledgeable about the process. I hope that this article has been helpful to you, and after discussing it with your parents, please consider reaching out to Binnall Law Group to allow us to assist you directly in your Title IX process.